Thursday, May 29, 2008

I've got wood

Yes in my eternal quest to misuse euphemisms (miseuphemisms?) I would like to proudly announce I've got wood. Lots of wood.
  • Bonfire grade. More of this than you can possibly haul off. Bring a truck. Bring five.

  • Clearance aisle (almost old enough to run in the Kentucky Derby). Mixed pecan and hickory. You figure out which is which, but I need the space.

  • Non-split pile. Small branches and odd knotty stuff that is impossible to split.

  • Splits. Yes this is the good stuff. Some assembly required. Its cut to length for the grill/pit. If you want it in your fireplace you are just going to have to use 2 for 1. Deal with it. The splitting hasnt started, but the cutting is done.

If history repeats itself, one of 2 things will happen.
  1. Everyone in the world will want some
  2. No one will want any.... Until everyone wants it.


Anonymous said...

With no comments (until now) it appears it is running course #2 referenced above.....

OK smartass, where am I now?

Spork In the Eye said...

Reply hazy, try again

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm.... have I stumped the stump farm genius? Your skills are rusty, young Jedi, but the force is strong with this one, no?

Spork In the Eye said...

Well if the planet had not exploded (and not even to create a hyperspace bypass) I could possibly have fingered it out. Now I gotta tap dance my way through a 48 hour TTL.

Anonymous said...

All will become clear after tonight's email. This will be far too easy, but I must say... my tractor is far, far, better than yours!

Spork In the Eye said...

Argentina! What do I win?