Sunday, July 6, 2008

Lessons from the middle: a Libertarian gude for Liberals

Being politically in the center, one has the disadvantage of both the lefties and the righties thinking you are a rightie or a leftie (respectively). In theory, they should be happy you half agree with them. In fact, they generally hold you in contempt for not making it 100%.

This lesson is for liberals. That is not to demean you "conservatives" (and I use that term loosely as there is no longer anything you particularly wish to conserve). I am mostly targeting liberals because:

  • they are more likely to be activists
  • they "fix" for something is generally to pass a law that stomps on individual rights
  • they have suddenly seemed to be learning from conservatives: to play on fear to control opinion

I am going to lay out a plan. Don't get bogged down in details here. This is a template to be used in a generic fashion. Modify and apply it to your situation, but by all means I get credit. (And by credit, I mean you owe me money.)

Let's set up a hypothetical situation. I will use real company names here, but by no means have I done any research. This is the science of pulling things out of my ass. Its an example, okay?

Let's say: you want to combat global warming. (I won't get into the debate about what is the cause, how dangerous it is, etc. Again: example. Extrapolate.) Assumption #2: You decide the biggest threat to global warming is the automobile.

Now: here's how you change things without passing laws. And as this is a global problem, this is a global solution.

  1. First make your vote by supporting someone that has done something you deem correct. In this case, you buy a hybrid. In fact, you and all your friends buy lots of them. Drive the price through the roof where people are paying more than sticker price. Pay enough more that you send the message "I am effectively paying $6 per gallon of gas and I don't care." (Hint: this step has already started. Move on to step 2.)
  2. Next buy a car company. Stop giggling. I am totally serious. Think back in history and how the big bad industrial complex was squashing the little guy. How did they fix it? By forming a union. And the union got them serious monetary representation to the boss man, making them get all they wanted (and arguably today, maybe more than they deserve in a few cases.) So: you form a Stockholder's Union. You and all your friends that believe the same thing pool your money and buy stock. A lot of stock. (Hint: GM is on sale right now, though that may or may not be the best choice.) You probably don't really have to have a majority. Historically a vocal minority has ruled over a majority quite often.
  3. Your Stockholders Union makes a stink. A big stink. You change the direction of the company. I dont know if that means more hybrid cars or more research into other alternatives or both or something different altogether. GM is now the greenest, most politically correct company on the planet. Gloat. Be smug.
  4. Force the board to put one of your cronies in a position of power. Pick a good cronie -- not based on how loud they are but how much ability they have. The goal here is to both make your political changes AND make money. This is the language the CEO understands.
  5. Wave your flag. Stand up and make a big stink about what you are doing and why. Use this both to get existing stockholders to join your union and to advertise to your buyers. Look how good you are compared to Ford or BMW.
  6. Point and spit on your competitors. Look how we have every envirogeek on our side and how they are stomping the planet like it was a big pile of garbage. Poo. Poo on them.
  7. If, by some chance, one of your competitors sees what you are doing and joins you.... Be quick to praise them openly and promote them in your own commercials. (You can always point out how your Chevy is still better than a Ford, but please, if you dont buy a Chevy, consider a Ford.) People will gawk and think you are crazy, but you will be oddly rewarded at how both companies sell more.

Dont think it will work? Try it. It makes a whole lot more sense than spending millions of dollars on political ads that bash the other side. Move On away from that tactic. I have found that as much as politicians divide us and make us argue, they very rarely actually do the thing that made us elect them. Oh sure there is a favor here and there which amounts to a handout to one group paid for by taxing another, but that really isnt solving anything is it?

1 comment:

Johnny B said...

That thar ole is cheaper - n - new wangs