I've got wood

Yes in my eternal quest to misuse euphemisms (miseuphemisms?) I would like to proudly announce I've got wood. Lots of wood.

• Bonfire grade. More of this than you can possibly haul off. Bring a truck. Bring five.
  
  
• Clearance aisle (almost old enough to run in the Kentucky Derby). Mixed pecan and hickory. You figure out which is which, but I need the space.
  
  
  
• Non-split pile. Small branches and odd knotty stuff that is impossible to split.



• Splits. Yes this is the good stuff. Some assembly required. Its cut to length for the grill/pit. If you want it in your fireplace you are just going to have to use 2 for 1. Deal with it. The splitting hasnt started, but the cutting is done.

If history repeats itself, one of 2 things will happen.

1. Everyone in the world will want some
2. No one will want any.... Until everyone wants it.
   

Full disclosure: Bacon report

After breakfast they went in... 3 slabs (about 11 pounds total) of bacony goodness. Bacon bacon bacon. Bacon.

They smoked for about 3 hours, then I commenced to process them. Most were sliced up, vacuum sealed and put in the freezer. The end bits were made into lardon (definition #3) for future banonificated stuff.

The end result:
Plain: pretty salty but gosh darn good
Maple: really good. I used only about half of the maple that the recipe called for (it seemed like a lot) but it could have used more. I guess I should have stuck to the recipe.
Garlic: ok, do I need to say anything more than "garlic bacon"? Do I? I am afraid I might get mugged by Homer Simpson if I went out in public carrying this stuff.

Berries

Everyone has one or two of those foods that are pure comfort foods and remind them of home. For me its berries. Particularly blackberries, but pretty much any berry. (I bet I have had a bowl of strawberries every day for the past month.... not that I am complaining.) And the blackberries are starting to ripen. We tried growing them in Metropolis, but the goopy black soil just wont support them. They grow great here. This is yesterday's and today's take. The plants are very young, so I expect future years will be even better. You will notice among the blackberries are a handful of raspberries (which I am assured will not grow here.) You can also see the whole row of raspberries which have almost become weed-like this year. We have tons of little 3 inch high plants that have escaped the bed (for anyone outside the black mucky soil that wants them, just ask) -- though I understand they dont grow here. Right now Ellie Mae is in the "kitchen" making a cobbler from her favorite food porn site.

And the most important news: the cure seems to have finished on the bacon. It now has to rest a day uncovered in the fridge before the smoke tomorrow.

Well hell.

I have briefly toyed with the idea of leaving the realm of the unemployed nogoodnicks. In fact, I went as far as to actually apply for a job... and even got an offer.

I have sort of fantasized about working at a small shop for quite some time (which is pretty much caused by working for an employer that is larger than the nearest city). I really like the people, and you can count the employees on your fingers and toes. It actually seems like a pretty cool place to work...

...until you consider the downside. It's 2 hours of commute a day. And it pays about half of what I am used to making (when I was employed) -- a little more than what a recent college grad made "in the big city" 10 years ago -- which probably is what they make for real now.

Its really hard for me to believe there is that much disparity between large/small companies. Or between big city/little city. I expected some -- though I really dont understand why. The cost of living in Smallsville is actually a tiny bit higher than it is in Metropolis.

and its down

Judging by the description (I wasnt here for the felling) I think it was a well spent $150. It seems they had a pretty hard time felling this against the lean. But its down now. Time for choppin'.